When Mary died of breast cancer at the age of 31, her younger sister, Jill, was her only living relative. Mary had been busy pursuing her career and had not yet married or had a family of her own. She and her sister, however, lived near to each other, visited often and were best friends.
Although Jill knew she wanted to give Mary the wonderful Funeral Service she deserved, she had no idea of where to begin. Neither Mary nor Jill had been obviously religious. However, losing their parents at a relatively young age had made both of them hang on tightly to traditions. Jill decided that she would like to have a traditional service but would endeavor to really make it celebrate the unique person that her sister had been.
She began by speaking with the Director of the Funeral Home she had picked. Part of the reason for her choice was the beautiful chapel that was on the Funeral Home grounds. She knew that Mary would appreciate its quaint setting, burnished wood pews, and cottage-like charm. The Funeral Director assured here that there were many ways to make Mary’s Funeral Service capture her personality.
Jill began Mary’s Service with a video tribute that included pictures of Mary through all the milestones of her life. The tribute was shown in sequence with the song “Somewhere Over the Rainbow”, sung by Israel Kamakawiwo—a newer, beautiful version of the oldie that both she and Mary had always loved. Jill had been afraid that the video would be much too sad, but she was surprised by the laughter at a picture of Mary as baby with porridge all over her face, and the spontaneous applause at the end of the tribute. It seemed like the pictures had just brought Mary’s true spirit into the little chapel.
Next, there were several readings by the minister that provided comfort to those attending and reflected upon Mary’s life and death. Following this, Jill had asked those entering the Service to write a fond memory or loving description of Mary on a small card she had supplied them with, and those who wished to stood and read their cards aloud. There were many moments of laughter and tears as everyone shared their memories of the wonderful woman Mary had been.
Finally, Jill stood and read a goodbye letter she had written to her sister. It had been extremely difficult and heart wrenching to write, and she hadn’t been sure she could read it without faltering. However, she managed with only a few pauses for support , and it seemed to give her strength and some bit of comfort to have shared a final farewell to her beloved sister with her other friends.
Mary’s casket was escorted down the chapel aisle while the song “Goodbye My Friend” by Linda Ronstadt played. As guests followed it out of the chapel, Jill gave each of them a small container of For-get-me-nots to be planted in their gardens. Mary had been an avid gardener and Jill hoped that these flowers, planted in the gardens of her many friends, would be a constant symbol of the love people had for Mary.